The other day I decided to take my dog and go to a local coffee house, a place I have not been since mid December.
This place was open all through Covid shutdowns and, I learned a bit late, has an anti-vaxer owner and became an anti-vaxer hangout. I'd avoided going anywhere nonessential until after I was vaccinated but for a single round of shopping that first Covid Christmas. Then, last summer I decided it would be OK if my walks with my dog went beyond the quiet less-populated suburbs into a more citified area and to this coffee house which has outdoor seating. I'd scoot in with mask on to order my coffee - usually the organic Guatamalan - and back out where I'd left my dog and her carrier. There were some trees that cast shade during the hottest part of the day, and it was never insufferable outside as a result. I took work with me but welcomed conversation; if the men who sat with me and told me their stories were not personally interesting to me, I imagined a couple of them might inspire some interesting characters.
Although I noticed that few other women actually spent hours there, that the crowd seemed to be mostly men who had known each other for years who stuck together, I was hungering for good conversation. I befriended an aging punk rocker who spent all his time writing and recording new music and never mentioned any connection I might have with musicians. A narcissistic sex addict wanted to be friends and tell me all about his women; some of the details were excruciating. And once in a while a missionary type woman would show up over there, with her dog. She was clearly obsessed with Jesus.
I was told by a man I met elsewhere that it was an ex-alcoholic/ex addict crowd and that by even being there, this was assumed about me. He advised me to go to a different coffee house that was owned by an ex law enforcement officer. This connection of a coffee house with drug addicts and alcoholics was not so surprising. Just about every independent coffee house I've ever hung out in had that AA/NA group, if not crowd, and to them I'm an outsider. Still, I have to appreciate their desire to get off their substances and stay off them. The independent owned by the ex law enforcement officer was more shiny, bright, and new, and much more expensive. It also lacked the prerequisite jazz playing in the background.
By summer's end, I was feeling through with the coffee house. There were two people who were there often who I cared about as human beings, both good and decent people who were having a very hard time of it and attempting to be stoic about that. Too stoic. I would think that I needed to go by there and check in with them even though I knew what I could do to help was very little. I also knew this truth about coffee houses. They are bars without the drinks. Any friendship you make at a coffee house depends on you going on down there. If you go away, no one will come looking for you. They may gossip about you for a couple weeks when it's clear you have gone away, but they will not come looking. If a friendship extends past the coffee house, if you make and keep plans to go and do things with someone you've met in one, then that relationship has the potential to become an actual friendship.
What also happened was that the trees got pruned within an inch of their life and in the wrong season. The butchered trees defied death while the sun bore down and the anti-vaxer owner and his employees seemed to be bothered by any request to put up the umbrellas, which they have. I began to wonder if he intended to rid the place of those of us who liked those outdoor tables. I began to wonder if he wanted to drive us indoors, where it was daring to go without a mask and some anti-government conspiracy types knew better than anyone else. This move did have the effect of loosing customers. Rumors swirled that he had enough and was letting his lease go and that the long time employees knew their days were numbered. Then one day in December I and my dog showed up and discovered that the outdoor tables had been removed. There was nowhere to go but in. And my dog was not welcome.
I arrived at the coffee house the other day and found it closed. There were workmen around. I heard it would reopen in a few days, so I decided to head for the coffee house that was owned by the ex law enforcement officer.
As I sat outside the woman who I'd met previously showed up with her dog. Immediately we started talking about the war in Ukraine. Then another person showed up, a man, with a dog that was wearing the full costume of a Service Animal. I may be wrong, but this person struck me as transgender - a woman who was appearing to be a man. It was not about hands or feet. It was his body type, slender with hips, the complexion that showed no evidence of facial hair, the short haircut that could work on male or female. He said he knew an ex beauty queen who was trying to escape Ukraine and was using his cell phone to send maps and directions, and giving advice such as that she should not wear jewelry or makeup, tuck her hair into a cap, dress like a man.
He said that they did not have this information available in the Ukraine.
I wondered about that.
(I checked web sites in Ukraine after this conversation and found them to be up.)
The man and the woman who is obsessed with Jesus connected. They agreed we were in the End Times. They believed our government was not telling us Everything. They connected this to vaccinations for Covid. Being dictated to. Not having choice. Already I was thinking, "Here we go!" Since I'm a liberal, I think they have the right to their opinions.
"My great-grandma said that when the German soldiers came through town, at least they were gentleman, but when the Russian soldiers came though, the women hid." I said. This is one of the reasons I personally have an innate distrust of Russians, which probably is not fair.
(This morning I picked up the first article I found in which it was reported that women were being raped in Ukraine.)
Ask me if I will always be a feminist, and I will tell you, "So long as there is rape."
The man shook his head yes, and went on his way, trying to save his friend, somehow.
The Jesus-obsessed woman sat at a table with me, offering to buy me coffee. I refused. My dog gave a sharp bark to her dog, a warning bark, because she cannot see well anymore and has become more frightened, which I explained to her. Her dog was not just taken aback but took offense and barked a lot at mine.
She brought up the End Times again, and with an eagerness, with a total belief that this is what is happening.
I mentioned that when I searched for news on the situation in Ukraine, some YouTube videos were coming up about Fatima - the third prophecy - the story that long ago when the third prophecy was read by the then-Pope, he fainted. It had to do with Ukraine and Russia. Supposedly some bishops in Ukraine were asking the Pope to Consecrate both countries to the Blessed Mother.
This revealed my Catholic heritage, I felt, and I knew the Jesus-Obsessed Born Again was probably in some form of Protestantism that deplores the very idea that any woman, even the Mother of the Savior, should be idealized or be prayed to. "Everything must be prayed in Jesus' name," was the usual outcry.
I watched as the Jesus Obsessed Born Again woman adjusted herself in her seat, a far away look in her eyes. I knew she was thinking about what she should say to me.
I shifted the conversation to Evil. Evil was something we could agree on.
"You should read the book, People of the Lie, by M. Scott Peck," I said. It's interesting. Every chapter is about a gradation of evil. He says that people who are perfectly possessed cannot be brought back through exorcism, but that he's participated in exorcisms and his psychiatrist peers need to consider that someone may not be mentally ill but possessed. Peck was a Christian by Conviction. I know evil exists and I've met people who are evil in my lifetime, even someone who I think is possessed."
She looked at me.
She asked me if I was fellowshipping anywhere. I said no.
She invited me to the Bible Study at her church. She said, "Would you meet with a group of women - it's just one night a week" making it sound harmless and easy - like selling Tupperware.
"Where is it?" I asked.
She told me where first by location, then name. I knew about this church. I once knew someone who was deeply involved there. I was thinking, "Crap."
I didn't say yes or no. I felt pressure. I knew she put pressure on me out of the goodness of her heart. She was clearly worried that I was not "affiliated" and in danger now that the End Times were unfolding for sure. I knew that I did not want to argue with her. She was a nice lady with a dog who mine had barked at and entitled to her Obsession. As Obsessions go, one with Jesus is probably not a bad thing.
Instead I mentioned the woman I knew who went to that church. I mentioned also that I heard the minister had been sick with Covid. (They had continued to meet for services unmasked.) I said I had heard that the woman who ran that Bible Study had a husband who had almost died, been in intensive care with Covid.
"Thanks Be To God," the Jesus-Obsessed woman said. "Jesus redeemed him."
She wanted my phone number.
I gave her an e-mail instead.
The church she belongs to says it is non-denominational and Bible based. I happen to know they are also Right Wing, anti-feminist, and Republican. Not a good fit for me. For some reason every single person I've ever met who goes there is intent on getting more members. Maybe they are a cult.
But then, I don't at this point think I will ever be a member of any church.
"Well, read that book, because as you probably know, there are some people who go to churches and temples and mosques who are still Evil people."
***
Yesterday I went to the library to return a book and there was a security guard out there on the sidewalk in front. Also it appeared from a distance that someone was selling sunflowers - the national flower of Ukraine. I said hello to the guard and asked him if the person was selling sunflowers - a fundraiser? He didn't know.
I said I had spent much time watching every video, reading every article, and felt concerned that some people seemed to be delighted with the idea that this was the End Times.
The guard stiffened and said, "THAT IS WHAT MY BIBLE TELLS ME."
***
I worry about so many people out there HOPING that the End Times are here, that whatever happens, all that violence, is part of God's Plan. (Just like Trump was part of God's Plan.) This God's Plan they talk about is OK to every form of violence, even nuclear war, because of the result; a thousand years of peace. I think, yea, because people will be struggling to survive for a thousand years, so few people will be left on earth. Or maybe it will be a thousand years of peace because there will be no humans left on earth. Another thing about this God's Plan is that this is God and we cannot question Him and we also cannot do a single thing about it. We are supposed to go along with it, if we die, well everyone dies right? (Sounds just like some anti-vaxers I met to whom I have had to say, "Yes but I AM NOT READY TO DIE!")
Putin was photographed a while back bowing to the Russian Orthodox icon of the Blessed Mother.
C 2022 Christine Trzyna
