THE FORTYISH BOY GENIUS and THE PLIGHT OF THROWN AWAY CAREGIVERS
In recent times, I met a most interesting and unusual person, for when he was sixteen he quit school to give care to his very ill mother, and she died when he was thirty eight, and he was there for her that entire time. And no his siblings were not.
And now he's alone, uneducated formally - not even a GED - and regularly pontificates on a great number of subjects. I imagine this is like Jesus in the temple, teaching the older and established rabbis, though religion is of the least interest to him. His world view is honed and he will tell you, authentically, that he's a Republican and why. He's detail oriented to a fault.
History, biochemistry, medicine, and so much else, he studied book by book for all those years while he remained at home as the one who cared for his mother and the others in the family went on their way - into mental illness, drug addiction, whoring, or some other less virtuous life.
So much we don't want to ask, such as where his siblings are now.
He's one of several people I've met in recent times who fit a profile. The child who sacrificed and then got thrown out of the family and/or thrown out of the estate/will. It's disgusting. It makes you suspicions when you meet someone new who says their sibling is caring for their parent.
So he's near forty and he's a genius no doubt, and the other thing about all those years at home and reading the equivalent of college level books, enough to be worthy of a Ph.D. in something, is that in conversation he needs to be always right. He takes over and dominates just about any conversation on any subject, and you imagine all those years when it was just him and his mom, not much social, not too many to talk to. He's making up for time.
And then you wonder, was his mother selfish? Why didn't she submit herself to another caregiver or a series of them, an assisted living, a nursing home - and free him to have a normal life, to finish high school and go on to college? Why didn't they leave the apartment? Was it financial?
She's dead. He's dead broke.
She hasn't been dead long, so I ask: "Have you had any signs from her? Any visitation dreams?"
He says no and doesn't believe he will.
He says he's trying to bulk up after not having enough to eat for some time.
Also, he's going to test out of the GED. Take a certificate course somewhere and become a techie first. Then he donates plasma for money. He says he'll get rid of storage as well as quit smoking. (He smokes though he has all sorts of advice about which vitamins and minerals are best for what ails you.)
What will he encounter in college?
I imagine him making it through many classes with ease but also being frustrated because he's going to think - or know - AND HE COULD BE RIGHT - that his knowledge is in conflict with what is being taught. It would probably take the PhD to actually be able to further an original thought. College is a whole lot about conformity in order to excel.
But we all think he will go far. Especially if his mother is there for him while on the Other Side.
C 2024 Christine Trzyna
