First of all, I am not an "anglophile."
And I realize that the time I read about British Royalty and Harry and Meghan is probably a waste of time because as an American what happens with the Royal family probably has no effect on my life. Obviously American politics is more important.
Today I took a class where I overheard two women, one a WASP, one "Hispanic," who were even more knowledgeable that I am about what's been happening with the Royals and far more opinionated. More vicious in their condemnations of Meghan Markle they were. Almost shockingly so. I felt all my reading qualified me to enter into this conversation. They didn't want to hear what I had to say. My opinion then proves to be moderate.
First, it has been known that Prince Charles has been in wait for his mother's death to have his turn at being King. Some think she decided to spurn him after the Princess Diana/ Camilla Parker Bowles debacle. Over the last decade or so and their marriage, Camilla has been accepted as Charles' love and King Consort if not Queen. Some people actually think Princess Diana was unstable and did a lot of wrong too because she had so many affairs while married but the sympathy has been with her because she was a mother and because she died too young, leaving Princes William and Harry motherless. The world, including me and my housemate at the time, watched the funeral. We stayed up all night and watched it live. Prince Andrew and Sarah Ferguson stepping up as the casket came by, heads bowed, nods of respect. Young Prince Harry, the shortest in the line up of Windsor, Wales, and Spencer men following the casket.
Although he was young, healthy, athletic, intelligent enough to fly a helicopter, handsome, and social, and no doubt had his pick of women, Harry seems to have had one long term relationship with a commoner that did not turn into marriage, and perhaps a few relationships that lasted less long. (Chelsy Davy heroically attended the wedding.) He seemed to be a partier but also a serial monogamist. It seemed that when it came right down to it, few women wanted to become part of the Royal Family, with all that control over their lives and all that media interest.
American actress Meghan Markle seems to have a sparkling personality, a warmth, an ability to handle crowds, and I believed her acting experience helped qualify her for the intensity of living a life in which one must constantly put on a good face and meet commoners, especially people who put on non-profits or benefit by them or need some compassion. Princess Diana lost HRH when she divorced but got called the Queen of People's Hearts - something like that - but she had been brought up in the wealth and atmosphere of high aristocracy and yet was not prepared for her husband to have a mistress... Markle has beauty and intelligence but also comes from a much more Working Class family, and a broken one.
Ambitious and hardworking. Let me say this. For every one person who manages to break into acting and get a few roles in film or a television series, there must be 5000 who can't get in, not at all, never, who just don't have connections or luck. Few succeed. Los Angeles is full of people waiting on tables in order to be available for the auditions. The WASP who knows everything and told me so today says she was in the business and knew those people and that world and so she said she feels Markle knew what she was getting into, including dealing with the paparazzi. She feels unimpressed with her acting accomplishments and current attitude. I thought that attitude was punishing.
To me Markle likely believed with all her heart she could handle it and has found this not to be true after all. I also count recent motherhood, and being a first time mother at the old age of 38, as a reason why she has found herself more fragile than she expected to be. Can't she even have a few years off before she returns to work?
Since so many of the Royal Families of Europe have become unseated from their thrones or stepped away and seek to be aristocratic yet ordinary.... Since Prince Charles is in his 70's and still has not had his moment... Since there are already Prince William and his son in line for that throne... Since Prince Charles has not allowed his brother, the now infamous and unemployed Prince Andrew, or his brother's daughter's Princess Beatrice and Princess Eugenie, to be part of his vision of a new smaller Royal Family... Who does he think should do all that soft diplomacy?
Well, it seems to me that Prince Harry and Meghan Markle, the Duke and Duchess of Sussex, absolutely should be realizing they have to make their own life, their own way in the world. Despite all the travel and visits to worthy people and causes they have made representing Britain, they were not destined to be part of the so called "Senior" (employed in soft diplomacy) Royals." Other Royals, such as Princess Anne, do much work for their country without being so much in the media, and have also done things like choosing not to have their children bear titles. I expected they would have their fame a while and then the media would turn to the next good story and they would live their lives much as Princess Anne has.
Queen Elizabeth has said she was going to give it another 2 years. Her husband is clearly showing his age, more hostile than usual. Either of them could die at any moment and suddenly Prince Charles would have his chance. I frankly think the Queen should have stepped down and allowed Prince Charles the life experience he was destined for at her 50th anniversary on the throne. She has made it 60 years and in two it will be 70 years. So at 73 years old, an age at which most Americans are retired, Charles will get his chance.
HERE IS WHERE THE REAL PROBLEM IS. There simply are too many non profits and do gooders around Great Britain that expect royals to be there for them. Great Britain has been a world power and has so many nations as part of the Commonwealth, but the seat of it, the island, is a small nation. It's 40 times smaller than the United States. California is almost twice as big. A good fit would be Michigan. Imagine if much of your life was spent going around Michigan smiling, shaking hands, meeting people, being a representative of Michigan on the world stage as well as every town's do gooders.
I think that while many aristocratic women want to marry into aristocracy and/or wealth, Prince Harry could have never married because being married to him is a JOB that nobody else wanted. I think it's incredibly difficult for anyone Royal to have a personal life, a private life.
Most American's I feel, completely understand wanting independence which includes a chance to FAIL ON ONE'S OWN MERIT, not just success. To do it, as in Frank Sinatra's classic tune, My Way. To make it on your own without your parents or family helping, is just sooooo American. Pride in accomplishment - even if the accomplishment is survival - is strong here. And Markle is a contemporary American woman.
C 2020 Christine Trzyna
