by MARTHA STOUT, PH.D (Harvard medical School instructor, psychologist)
C 2005 by the author
Broadway Books New York
How do you identify the sociopath, the one in 25 people who can do anything to you - the most horrendous things - without regret, compassion, or even consideration for your feelings because they themselves have near none? This short but to the point book by Martha Stout may help you realize who is likely to have this frightening (to us) mental illness. Sociopaths are rarely in a jail cell but more likely in your workplace or own bed. Stout helps those of us who have been victimized by these characters realize that identifying them and eliminating them from our lives is about all we can do, since they can be as clever and charming as they are damaging. To help you, my reader, get to the point of it, here are some important excerpts from Stout's book:
Page 43...
"No, Skip was not consigned to eh edges of society, he does not drool, and he is not (yet) in prison. In fact, he is rich and, in many circles, respected - or at least feared, which masquerades brilliantly as respect. So what is wrong with this picture? Or perhaps the question should be: What is the worst part of this picture, the central flaw in Skip's life that makes him into a tragedy despite his success, and into the maker of tragedies for so many others? It is this: Skip has no emotional attachments to other people, none at all...
His mother is there to be ignored, or sometimes baited. His sister is there to be tormented. Other women are sexual plunder and nothing more. He has been waiting since childhood for his father to do only one thing - to die and leave his money to Skip. His employees are there to be manipulated and used, as his friends have always been. His wife and even his children are meant for the eyes of the world. They are camouflage,. Skip is intellectually gifted, and he's fabulous at the gamesmanship of business. But by far his most impressive talent is his ability to conceal from nearly everyone the true emptiness of his heart - and to command the passive silence of those few who do know...
pages 50-51
"Still, I believe that somewhere buried safely away from consciousness, there may be a faint internal murmuring that something is missing, something that other people have. I say this because i have heard sociopaths speak of feeling "empty" or even "hollow." And I saw this because what sociopaths envy, and may seek to destroy as part of the game, is usually something in the character structure of a person with conscience, and strong characters are often specially targeted by sociopaths...
Page 90
"Moreover, the shameless know us much better than we know them. We have an extremely hard time seeing that a person has no conscience, but a person who has no conscience can instantly recognize someone who is decent and trusting.... an easy mark...a caring person who could be counted on to assume more than her fair share of responsibility.
Page 91
"And sexual seduction is only one aspect of the game. We are seduced as well by the acting skills of the sociopath. Since the scaffolding of a life without conscience is deception and illusion, intelligent sociopaths often become proficient at acting, and even at some of the particular techniques employed by professional actors. Paradoxically, the visible signs of emotion at will can become second nature to the cold-blooded- the appearance of intense interest in another person's problems or enthusiasms, chest-thumping patriotism, righteous indignation, blushing modesty, weepy sadness.... Crocodile tears from the remorseless are especially likely when a conscious-bound person gets a little too close to confronting a sociopath with the truth. A sociopath who is about to be cornered by another person will turn suddenly into a piteous weeping figure whom no one, in good conscience, would continue to pressure...
Page 115
"Sociopaths sometimes exhibit brief, intense enthusiasms - hobbies - projects, involvements with people - that are without commitment or follow-up. These interest appear to begin abruptly and for no reason, and to end the same way.`
